So, today I am feeling helpless. I guess because I am hurt but mostly because I feel like I need to save to world right now. I know in my heart of hearts that you cannot save people. That just because you wish, or want them to be better or not be hurting that it won't actually happen. It does not matter how much I might love someone because if they do not love themselves or perhaps have had an absence of love their whole lives then, nothing I can say or do can ever make it okay. Have you ever been in the middle of a terrible break up and you surround yourself with your best friends and fun things to do but no matter what they do or say you are still sad and thinking about it? I feel like this must be like what it is to feel unloved and alone in the world. Right now I feel alot of stress because I want to save everyone, including myself. I tried to help out a friend recently, after she hit what I would consider rock bottom and she told me that I needed to look in the mirror. Which hurt so much because the things I told her came from love and concern. Sometimes it is easier to try to fix others than focus on ourselves.
I wish that there was a way to make him unsad. I asked him once why he doesn't put his bad feelings into songs and he told me that it's just to awful to think about and that he just wants to focus on happiness and the good things and make music with his three best friends. All of you who hate that I came along, because I made him "happy" and now you can't relate- well, let me tell you this. There is nothing I could ever say or do to make him feel complete, happy or even attempt to fill to void. Nothing. I feel helpless, distraught and sad too. It hurts so much to watch hurt exist. It hurts to see someone so wonderful, sweet and full of love, feel so alone, betrayed and unimportant. So, if you see him on the street or in a random mall give him a big hug.
LA PUTA MADRE QUE LO PARIÓ, QUE INJUSTO TODO.
Hace 1 año
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